My Life Story

My Pride & Joy,My source of Strenght
My Flesh & blood
The two guys in my life

Hey!Wanna really know Who's Darlene is?Oh,well here's my life story that i already posted in my friendster account long time ago.But i decided to put it here so you guys can read it.I want you to know that what i am now,my past had helped a whole lot to become ME today.Each & everyone of us has past that we had dealt,different experiences,different way of lifestyle,& different style of how our parents brought us up.And i am really thankful that GOD really loves me & takes care of me pretty much for giving me such a wonderful life now.He gave me such a loving husband & an adorable son,i couldn't ask for anything more,i have everything already.Hope you guys will enjoy reading about my life story that i now enjoyed reminiscing,instead of feeling bitter about it.

I finally made the decision to do this kind of thing.I was hesitant to make blogs before coz i'm thinking & a bit scared that readers might not like it.Well,hope that through my blogs,you guys will know me better & you'll probably shake your head for what you're about to know about my life story.........
I belong to a big family,i have 8 siblings,5 brothers & 3 sisters,i am 6th from the eldest,the youngest girl.We all born in mindanao southern part of philippines.My father used to be a manager in a logging company but he resigned i think when i was 4 yrs old,i couldn't really remember it very well.Anyway,my mother has several business like,importing shells,we have fishing boats,we have convenient store,we have live bands bar(my eldest bro & my 3rd sis was the singer),& we sell kilos of fishes.We belong in middle class as i thought.My mom was very busy then doing all those business without the help of my lazy father.My father was very good in PR(public relationship)he had lots of friends in politics,businessmen & some famous people in our place.But when it comes to his own family(his kids),he doesn't even know how to manage very well.I hate to say this but i hate my father so much eversince.He's not a type of father that every child will be proud of.I call him a dectator,very tight to us his children & one mistake whip right away.I grew up with bitterness & hatred.He doesn't even know how to appreciate things,he's always sees bad instead.No matter how i tried to make him please,still nothing good words will come out to his mouth,he'll just say"that's not good enough"or"you're a loser".Well eventhough my father is treated me like that,but i still have mom always fired me up,she's always there to cheer me up.I can still remember she always say"if you'll be in the top ten this year i'll buy you a dress,pair of shoes & hair ties".OMG!she's a good mother,she always inspires me.Thank GOD my mother is always there for me no matter how busy she is,she still have time for us her kids.Until i reached fourth grade,very early in the morning,my father woke up,he threw up blood maybe a bucketfull.We were wondering what's wrong with him then,so my mom took him to the doctor in cebu.They found out that he is having a serious illness,he is acute diabetic.From then on he always got sick so bad & there were times he couldn't get up & he gets wounds just suddenly appears & it'll take sometime to heal.From then on he's gettin' worse & worse.Deep inside me then was happiness,coz he couldn't hurt us anymore & use his belt buckle to whip us everytime we make mistakes.He's been sick for quite a while exactly 6 long years,& my mom took care of him & my mom's business went down real fast until it was totally gone coz she can't take care of it anymore & my sisters & our eldest brother flew to manila to find their own happiness as we say.So we,the younger ones just left with my mom & dad.Year 1993 when my mom sent me to my sister in manila coz she can't take care of us anymore she just want the lil' ones to be with her,i was in highschool then in 2nd year.My 3 younger brothers are still with my mom they were so little then.Ireally feel bad everytime i reminisce all these things coz i feel so sorry for my mom coz she did a very hard work for taking care of my younger siblings & to my sick dad.I was 3rd year when my dad died it was year 1996 in january.I was still in manila then,& my classmates knows the death of my father & they asked me if i'm goin' home,i just answered them simply"NO,why should i?We have preliminary examinations comin',& if i'll go home,is he gonna go back to life again?I don't think so!I'd rather stay here & take the exams,he's not been a good father to me anyway".I said to myself "at last the monster died,he can't hurt me anymore or do something bad".No tears fell from my eyes coz he died,in fact i was happy deep inside.Few months after he died,my mom called my sister,she wants me back.My mom moved to her birthplace a year before he died.So i went home & finished my last year in highschool there,then i graduated finally.Later that night of my graduation day,my mom talked to me,she said she can't let me proceed to college coz she doesn't have source of income to pay the tuitions & other fees in school.I got so upset coz i really wanted to finish my studies til' college,but then i realized that i couldn't do anything about it,so i decided to find a job instead,i don't wanna get stucked & do nothing.I was so young at the age of 17,but full of energy & life,willing to take the risk & face the challenge the real life of the world.My mom used to call me "FIGHTER"coz she always sees me fighting,not letting anybody step my feet,always ready to win the battle.Anyway,i got my very first job at the age of 17,i cheated my age in my birth certificate,not authenticated though,it is just a local municipality issue LOL!.In my workplace they always teased me "BATA" which means i'm just a "BABY" got lost trying to find my way.They used to tell me"Hoy bata,gisugo raka ug suka sa imong nanay noh unya nasaag ka diri sa kompanya?"hahaha!that was so funny.I worked there for nearly 5 years as i thought.Then i resigned due to the company is not working good no more.I went back to manila to find a job there,but instead a job,i found a guy that awaken my innocent feeling,he's lil' older than me but i find him very interesting.He's tall,dark but not handsome,just a simple looking guy.I fell in love with him,that was the very first time i fall for a guy,i hate guys so much then except my brothers coz i'm thinking guys are all alike,mean & users.We were committed for four long years & quite happy together.I really thought that he's gonna be the man that i'm goin' to marry.But i was wrong,until my aunt here from utah(got married to an american guy long time ago)went home for a funeral of my grampa & asked me if i have a boyfriend,i said yes,but unfortunately my family doesn't like him.Then my aunt said "well,i'll find a better one for you" i just replied her"don't bother,i'll work it out,they will like him soon".I didn't really take it seriously what my aunt did say to me i thought she was just kiddin' me.Then she went home again to visit her family,& she have something for me,a letter from an american guy,never know who he was but i still responded his letter.And after all that,he finally decided to come over to see me,& he did liked me,but in my mind was very confused & troubled.He's a good guy & loves me & that makes me think real hard to do the right thing.I made a very big decision in my life,i chose the american guy which is my husband now.I love my boyfriend but things are not gonna work fine with us,it hurts me so much that i left him & i broke his heart so bad too,he told me that he won't find any woman anymore,i will be the last woman in his life.Well,i am wishing for his happiness now,hope he can still find a right one for him.It is just that we're not really meant for each other & we're not destined to be together forever.As my present life's goin' ,i am very happy,contented & grateful for what i have now,no bitterness no hatred living in my heart anymore,i couldn't ask for anything more,GOD is been so good to me,i can tell that HE is always there for me,inspite of all the hardships in life that ive'd been through,i'm still standing here now & proud to be a woman,a daughter, a sister,a wife & a mother.I thank all these to HIM,HE guides me in the right path,HE always there when i'm weak & helpless.I hope you guys learned something from my story.All i can say is,just let things go on,move on,leave the past behind,& face the present & the future ahead of you.

Update Of My Baby's Birthday

This is the update of my boy's birthday.From the day of his birthday & after his birthday.His grampa went to a meeting so unfortunately he wasn't there on my baby's party,but his grampa promised to throw another party for my boy,isn't that fun?Two parties for a birthday boy!Wow!His grampa is been spoiling him so much,but i tried stop that coz he might get use to that kind of style,being pampered too much.

Anyway,here's his pictures on the day of his birthday,his party!

And this pictures was taken after the day of his big day,when he finally had his own bike.

Enjoy viewing my baby's photos!Happy Mother's Day Mothers!

My Tourist Guide

This morning my baby & i went to SHOPKO store coz i wanna buy him a "SPIDERMAN 3" shirts.I grabbed his stroller & put him right into it & we're on our way!I am getting ready for his party tomorrow that's the main reason why we went to that store so i can take a look what kind of presents we're gonna get for our dear young man.After that,we stopped by to a friend's house just a block away from ours,we spent our time there for a while & ate lunch.My baby had so much fun coz there's 2 kids out there too.They played & talked to each other as if they were pretending that they're gonna go for a ride each bike of theirs in the main street.These are the photos i took while they were playing:

I guess it was three in the afternoon when i decided to go home so my boy can take a nap coz i already can tell that he's pretty much worn out.When we we're on our way,i was gonna put him in his stroller but he told me "mom walk",so ok, i let him walk so he'll go right to sleep soon as we get home.And he did walk pretty good from my friends house until in our house.Here's some pictures i took while we're heading home:

I'm pretty sure my boy had so much fun for this day,he had a big day today!Right after i put him in his own bed,he slept like a log,poor boy!
He was really tired.I was looking at my son while he was sleeping ,i just laughed & i told myself,"What a proud mother i am to this adorable young prince of mine".......
Happy Mother's Day To All Proud Mothers!

Smart Woman

This is just a funny story that i received from my sister in law.Women are always smart,aren't we?Enjoy reading it!

Eleven people were hanging on the rope under the helicopter,ten men & one woman.The rope wasn't strong enough to carry them all,so they decided that one had to leave,because otherwise they were going all to fall.They weren't able to name that person,until the woman gave a very touching speech.She said that she would voluntarily let go of the rope, because, as a woman, she was used to giving up everything for her husband and kids, or for men in general, and was used to always making sacrifices with little in return.As soon as she finished her speech, all the men started clapping their hands.......

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY TO ALL THE MOTHERS IN THE WORLD!

My Goal That Must Accomplish

My youngest brother with my son

Lastnight i was talking to my mother on the phone,i told her about us here that we're doing great & happy as always.She was worried about me coz i have pain in my chest & back.But instead i diverted her attention by asking her if our youngest brother will go back to school coz he stopped last semister.His excuse is he cannot stand the lesson,it's too complicated for him & it's really hard to study those kind of stuff,but actually he can really do it,he just wanted a break for a while.I didn't chose that course for him though,it's him who chose it for himself.So,my mother handed the phone to my youngest brother & we talked if he wants to continue this school year,& he said he will coz he realized that boredom is driving him nuts!He is always in the house & nothing to do,unlike being in college always in school & it's fun as well coz he's gonna see his classmates & friends.I talked to him heart to heart,telling him how much he means to me that's why i want him to finish his course so he can find a better job in the future,& how lucky he is coz he doesn't have to undergo hardships when it comes to money coz i & my husband will take care of it.He promised that he's gonna finish it & he won't stopped again not even for a semister.I keep reminding him over & over again how frustrated i was to proceed college before but because our mother doesn't have a job to support my needs if i get to college.So i decided to find a job instead,& i did!i had my very first job at the age of 17 at the electronics company.But anyway,that's my big Goal in life,to see my 2 younger brothers finish their studies,i didn't asked them anything more or oblige them to anything to pay me for their studies,

that's all i want for them is to finish & i'll be happy enough.I told them too that soon as i get my citizenship i will petition our mother right away so the 3 younger bros.will follow right after her hopefully.I want them to experience what i have here in america,i want them to feel that they are very special to me & i love them with all my heart.

Dreams

Do you dream everytime you go to sleep?I myself,i do.Different kinds of dreams every night or even if i just take a nap during afternoon.

Sometimes i dreamed like i am in highschool again,weird isn't it?I was hoping that i could finish my studies until college but unfortunately it didn't happened due to financial shortage.But what's funny is i keep dreaming about my highschool days in that certain school & that certain classroom,& lastnight i dreamed again but i don't recognize the teacher,it's a guy teacher,& he's kinda terror teacher but i find him funny coz he's fat,he's wearing suspender & his big tummy is hangin' out in his pants,lol! i can't forget what he looks like in my dream.He is very strick as a teacher,he wants every student to pay attention to him,Oh well all teachers are like that though,but not all are strick like the teacher in my dream.So,i researched what does dream means,then i found this dream moods that can tell why i am dreaming such things like this.Here's the explainations why:

High School

To dream about high school, refers to the bounds and friendships that you made while you were in high school. What spiritual lessons have you learned? The dream may also be telling you that you need to start preparing for the real world.To dream that you have to repeat high school, suggests that you are doubting your accomplishments and the goals that you have already completed. You feel that you may not be measuring up to the expectation of others. The dream may occur because some recent situation may have awakened old anxieties and insecurities.

Teacher

To see your teacher (past or present) in your dream, suggests that you are seeking some advice, guidance, or knowledge. You are heading into a new path in life and ready to learn by example or from a past experience. Consider your own personal experiences with that particular teacher. What subject was taught? Alternatively, it may relate to issues with authority and seeking approval. You may going through a situation in your waking life where you feel that you are being treated like a student or in which you feel you are being put to a test.

Hmmm,i wonder if this is true. But honestly,i do agree of what it said,coz i undergone anxieties & insecurities recently.Good thing i found this website that can read dream meanings,i understand now what my dream meant to say.What's in your dream by the way?

Feathered Scarfs

A lot of friends say that i should start a business coz i am very good in crafting,sewing & cross stitching.But i just answered them that i don't think i'm gonna do it coz i'm gonna lost my quality time with my family especially with my son,Coz for sure i'm gonna focus my time to those things.I did those things for past time or hobbies,not for business.I really love making things that's worth to keep,like scarfs during winter & nice to see the different colors in it.Some of these scarfs i already gave to my friends,& they love it coz it's soft & gentle in their skin.I learned how to make scarf from my husband's niece,she likes to make crafts too,that's why we were very compatible as friends coz we have something in common.These pictures below are the scarfs i made:




For sure it looks nice to your eyes isn't it?I love to touch them & put around my neck during winter coz it help makes me feel warm when i'm outside.What color do you like?I like the red one better.
I love making scarfs & perhaphs i will keep making these things until i get old.

Why Do I blog?

Ive'd been tagged by Miss P,Why Do I Blog?She tagged me couple of days ago,i told her that i'm gonna do it if i have spare time coz my baby always wanting my attention for him.And here now i made the tag from Miss P, Thank you Miss P!


1.My First blog was in friendster but after 3 posts,i never updated it since.I blog because i find it very fun to share to the people i meet thru internet what 's in my mind so they will get to know me better by reading my entries.

2.My second blog is here.I was chatting with Ivy when she mentioned about the bisdak planet that she's into it.So she told me how fun it is to be with bisdak family.She gave the link to register & she was the one taught me how to register in blogspot.She was the one helped me to fix my site too.Then later on i tried to design my own bloghouse & i made it just right.I got more interested about blogging because i meet a lot more friends here than in friendster.
More chance i get to know each person who visits my sites coz they leave some thoughts & because of that i can tell what kind of people i encounter in this blog thing.

3.I blog so i can express what i feel & share what i have & what kind of person i am.I consider blogging as my personal diary that everyone can read it,no secrets,it's like an open book.

4.I blog because i find it very interesting to read friend's entries as well.Getting some idea how amazing they are in this kind of thing.They made it as past time but getting a lil' money from it too,which is good coz it's worth to sit in the computer while doing the blogging & making money from it.Mostly the entries ive'd read are good & it's about family quality & some beauty tips & etc.

5.I blog because i like to write things,makes me feel good & calm after writing things that i wanted to write.Before this blog thing,i used to have a big notebook & i write things about my life in that notebook & i love reading it over & over what kind of problems i encountered for the past couple of years & what kind of experience i had before.But since i found this blog thing,i got more excited to write coz i meet more good friends while sharing my life to them,& so as the other way.



So far this is all i can say why do i blog.It's really fun to do the blogging & always excited to read a lot of entries from friends.Anyway,just want to thank Miss P again for tagging me.And i'm gonna tag next these friends.....
Daffodale,Lutchi,Carolyn,Julai,& Anne.

Happy Monday to all my friends & Godbless!

Bestfriends

Have you treasured someone you call bestfriend?Is that someone still the best among your friends until today?Well,i'll tell you,i got one.She's been my friend since we were born,her mother delivered her 3 days after i was born.We grew up like we were sisters,in fact i'm much closer to her than my sisters coz my age was really way behind to my biological sisters,they're grown up when i was just a lil' girl.Good thing i have her.By the way her name is Richel.She is kinda quite type of person & always down to earth, though if get mad at her for some nonsense reason,she always sticks with me as if she can't live without me lol! That's one thing i really like to her,she always approaches me everytime we have misundertandings(i used to be prideful but not anymore).A lot of people in our town call us twins,because everywhere i go she's there too & wherever she goes i am there for sure.In our childhood days we're very famous in our town because every activities we are part of it,we sing & dance,we both have that talent.In school,we're part of the band parade since first grade until 6th.We parted our ways in highschool,my mother sent me to my sister in manila to continue my studies in there.But still we got communication by writing letter to each other.I wasn't able to proceed college due to financial problem,but she did proceed college until she graduated as magna cum laude,i think her major was about nature i just can't quite remember what it's called.She's pretty smart person but she's dummy when it comes to love i guess.She got married to a muslim now in maguindanao & she knew that i was upset about her decision marrying that muslim guy coz i know muslim's custom,they get married as much as they can as long as they can feed their family.But what can i do?She has the right to decide of her own,it's her life anyway not mine though we're friends but i don't have the right to interfere her decisions in life.Anyway, here i am too got married & residing on the other side of the world,we're so far from each other but still have the communication with her through internet & cellphones(thanks a lot to the new technology,we were able to communicate our family & friends from far away).Sadly i wasn't able to see her while i had my vacation last march.She's been a really good person,good friend & a good sister to me although i wasn't that good to her many times when we were just lil' girls coz i'm so moody & impulsive.I always get upset,everytime my father compared her to me,coz she's always the top notcher,while i was just in the middle among the top ten.I did tried my best to beat her up but i guess every individual has the IQ limit & that's all i got,she has more than i have when it comes to intelligence.Well anyway,that didn't ruin our friendship though,we're still as close as ever.& i love her for being so real,humble caring & always thougtful to me.She always sends offline message telling me to be always safe & how she miss me so bad.

Anyway,i will share you our very cute picture when we're just cute lil' girls in gradeschool lols!
That's us!Can you tell who's who?That was me on the right side,aren't we cute?just kidding lols!actually i look like i was mad or upset to the photographer isn't it?Hope you have one like my bestfriend too,friends after decades passed by,still here we are until now.We will be bestfriends forever......

My Boy's Big Day Is Coming So Soon!

I just realized this morning that month of MAY is on the way now.& then i started thinking about my son's big day & it'll be 2 weeks from now.
Suddenly i was reminiscing the day he was born & the times he got sick & the times he learned his first step & first word that he said.How come kids grow so fast?You won't even realize that they're no longer your baby until they will tell you "Hey mom,I'm grown up already.You don't need to treat me like a baby!i can take care of myself pretty much now".Oh my Lord!Well my baby is not that independent yet but like i said,they grow so fast & time flies so quick.So,i am now thinking a small party for his big day,just selected friends here (kay mga taga bisdak lagyo man tua sa pikas bungtod ang uban,so imposible jud nga mubutho diri sa akong payag diri sa UTAH).I am thinking what should i prepare,i'm gonna have his party in our backyard like i did on his first big day.I had games for the kids,pinata,touch the color,& answer my question & it was fun,my baby had fun though he didn't appreciate what was goin' on but i can tell that he's happy coz he screams if he heard the kids laughters.Maybe i'll do the same game again this year.
And the other side of my mind is thinking of a present for my dear special young man,What should i get?

1.Toys?Hmmmm,he has bunch of toys laying around his room,he can't even pay attention to the other toys of his.Always makes me tired picking up those toys everywhere,coz wherever he plays it,he'll leave it there.Sometimes at night i'll step some of his toys when its in my way,gosh that hurts my feet!

2.Shirts,Pants Or Shoes?My husband always says"Oh No!don't buy a whole lot honey,that boy grow so fast & before he can wear all them it'll be tight to him already.I just can't help it!If i see nice shoes,shirts & pants for him i can't resist but to buy it.

So,Anybody will help me pick the right present for my young man?I don't really know what to get for him though,i'm still thinking & it will be 2 weeks from now.
Any idea will be deeply appreciated......I know that most of bisdak families are mothers already so you guys know already how to handle this things.


Take care & Godbless Everyone!!!